No, on second thought, nothing that has anything to do with me is the least bit normal, I must say.
For example, take this gift…the one that I purchased for Little Bit while Whizzy and I were vacationing in Rome. You’d think that purchasing a souvenir gift for a one-hundred twenty pound puppy (Dear Merlin! Now she weighs more than I do, well, at least at my non-pregnant weight.) was even too ridiculous for even me to carry out. No, not quite.
And to top it all off, the actual gift itself is much more ridiculous than the absurdity of me purchasing a souvenir gift for a dog (even though I suspect I was just trying to come up with an excuse to actual get Charlie a gift and not the dog).
So I tuck the oversized bowl under my arm as I head for Charlie’s office. When I arrive I find him eating his lunch.
“What kind of sandwich is that you’re eating?” I ask as I stand in the doorway of his open office.
“Er,” he stammers, obviously caught off-guard, “Um, egg salad?” He looks up at me with a confused expression on his face.
“Mmmm, I forgot my lunch on the kitchen counter this morning,” I say, “Mind splitting yours with me? Besides, being six months pregnant, I’m breaking wind constantly; egg salad won’t make it any worse.”
“Sure,” he offers and moves to stand but I wave him to sit back down. “What the hell is that?” he asks as he motions to the huge bowl I’m carrying. I place the obnoxious monstrosity on his desk before I sit in the chair facing Charlie.
“A present, er, for Bit,” I say as I notice Charlie staring doubtfully at the bowl. “It’s a replica of the Coliseum in Rome.”
“For Bit? You’re kidding, right?” he asks, “What would she want with a replica of the Coliseum?” He laughs and shakes his head. “You’re losing it, Tonks.” He jibes.
“Just wait, just you wait, and watch this,” I say as I stand and move until my face hovers just above the bowl-shaped model. “This is the most brilliant thing. Just watch.” I crouch by the bowl on Charlie’s desk and place my hands on either side of the bowl. Soon a slight trickling announces the gentle whooshing of water as it fills the bowl, lolling in circles, around and around, until it is nearly filled.
“Gryffindor’s Ghost that’s wicked!”
“Not over yet, look,” I nod toward the water’s surface and soon two ethereal Roman ships appear opposite each other from across the bowl. Once they completely materialize, oars row the crafts in circles along the rim. “Thought Bit might like having a water bowl like this.” I sit back down and Charlie and I watch the two little ships as they travel in circles around the circumference of the Coliseum model. “And in about five minutes the ships will disappear and the water will drain until someone reactivates the charm by hovering above the surface again.”
“Like Bit going to the water bowl for a cool drink?” he asks with a smile, “Fantastic gift, Tonks, absolutely amazing.”
He offers me the uneaten half of his egg salad sandwich.
“Remind me to stay away from you for the rest of the day.”
“As if you won’t be farting and belching the whole afternoon yourself,” I reply. I take a bite of the sandwich. “Mmm, but it is good. Molly’s recipe?” He nods.
“So tell me about Rome. I would have loved to seen it with you.” He looks across at me and scrunches his eyebrows. “Um, er, you know what I mean.”
“Yeah, I think I do, Charlie,” I reply with a smile as I begin to tell him about my trip to Rome. We fall into a casual comfort as he comments on my adventures. I lose track of the time as we banter back and forth.
“But I think you would’ve chosen to be a Gladiator or a Roman General instead of an Emperor,” I say with a giggle. “You would have died laughing had you seen all those loaves of bread pelting Whizzy for granting that poor fighter his life.” We both chuckle before a sudden silence overtakes the room.
“Well, thanks for the lunch,” I say. “You’re a lifesaver, and kiss Little Bit for me, won’t you? I only wish I could be there to see her when she first drinks out of this.” I motion toward the Coliseum dog water bowl as I stand to leave.
“Tonks,” Charlie says awkwardly, “Don’t go!…Just yet?”
I stop before taking a step.
“Charlie? Is everything alright? What’s wrong? Are Aveline and the baby okay?”
“They’re fine,” he replies, “It’s just, well, it’s just that…I want to, I want to…I need to apologize to you.”
</i>An apology out of nowhere and why?</i>
“What are you talking about, Charlie?”